Goal: Gary Reay
Report: Mike Stephens (to follow, maybe)
Photos: Chris Stading
The Dock Association Football Club
Stirrup 4-1 Dock (Houlihan’s BSFL Premier Division)
The Tower 0-4 Dock (Houlihan’s BSFL Premier Division)
A fine performance from the Dock as they crossed the border into Wallasey. Gary Reay and Lee Hammond were playing on home turf and you could sense the extra spring in their step as the pair of them showed promise early on.
As early as the 10th minute Reay man forced a save from the keeper as he pushed over a drive from the reigning ‘Golden High Heel’ champion and he was involved in the build up for the first goal as Reay fed Mick Saunders who then danced past a couple of defenders and spotted the arriving Craig Donaghy who slotted left footed past the keeper for 1.0.
On 20 minutes Lee Hammond produced a superb penetrating run from left back, deep into the heart of Towers’ half that was only brought to a halt by a foul on the Wallasian right on the edge of the box. Donno’s resulting free kick was collected safely by the keeper. On the half hour mark Reay man forced another save from the keeper as he blocked with his legs after good link up play from the lively Billy Newman and current Ballon d’Or recipient Ivan Drago.
In the 33rd minute Hammond whipped in a magnificent cross to the far post for Mick Saunders to finish with aplomb and 2.0 it was. A great ball and smart finish…High Sixes all round. Saunders again was prominent as he slipped Reay man in only for the keeper to thwart him again with his legs. Half time and 2.0 it was and a fine half, full of running and excellent link up play.
The second half mirrored the first as Craig Johno struck the bar with the keeper routed to the spot but he made amends two minutes later as he curled one in with his left foot with fine approach play from Saunders and Reay, 3.0 with 52 minutes gone.
Just past the hour mark Billy Newman struck the post after a surging run down the right and two minutes later hit the bar with a scooped effort that deserved better. On the 70th minute Billy was involved in good interplay along with Dono and Johno which resulted in Newman pulling the ball back for Reay man who scuffed his shot past the keeper for 4.0. This sparked jubilant scenes as Reay scored on his return to his homeland for his 3rd goal of the season. I’m sure I spotted a tear in the master marksmans eye as he returned to his mark for the resulting kick off.
In the 75th minute The Goose entered the fray replacing Donno who was off for another 9 minutes on the sunbed at ‘Tantastic’. Goose played up front and showed some deft touches but turned like a double decker bus. The last of the action saw Brunty put the ball into the back of the net and wheel away with a finger raised in celebration only for the ref, the excellent ‘Rocket’ Ronny to disallow presumably for offside.
A word about debutant goalkeeper, Martin Stevenson, who showed good hands, kicked well and commanded his area with authority also Ian Irvine has settled nicely showing a calm neat and tidy approach to his football and are both welcome additions to the squad.
Man of the Match
Ian Brunt, closely followed by the excellent Billy Newman who caused havoc on both flanks.
Report: Mike Stephens
Photos: Chris Stading
THE BRUNTY INTERVIEWS (PART II)
Over the last few weeks Mick Stephens has conducted a series of one-to-one interviews with the legend that is Ian Brunt. In them we reveal a fascinating insight into the mind of a superstar, what makes him tick? what drives him on ? At times these meetings often ended in violence and more than once the Police were called. On conclusion of these interviews we were forced to sign a confidentiality clause by Brunts lawyers. This I do not recognise and here are those interviews in full.
In part II of the Brunty interviews, Stevo spends six months in hospital recovering from the vicious attack on him by Brunt and his P.A. Louis Spence. You may recall him being beat up when he asked about Brunt’s designer stubble in part I of these recordings. This enraged Brunt so much, Stevo was in intensive care and it was touch and go for a while.
During these six months Brunt’s career was in overdrive, Man of the Match award in the Wirral Premier Cup Final, Outstanding solo goals in league matches to win the points that eventually win the league, stunning hat-trick in the Memorial Cup Final and perhaps his finest hour…..leading his team to a 1.0 victory in the Veronica Conway Cup Final. The Dock had 3 men sent off but Brunt produces a Roy Keane type performance to drag his team to glory scoring the winner in injury time of extra time!
Brunt gets nominated for The Ballon d’Or (European footballer of the year for those who don’t know !) but stuns the football world by asking for a transfer from The Dock! Binksy is incandescent with rage and is seething when he visits me in hospital as I recuperate……..
BX.- He’s asked for a f.’#kin’ move ! After all we’ve done for him. He’s asked for a f.’#kin’ move ! He was f’#kin’ nothin’ before he came here…f’#kin’ nothin’! Do’ya know that he’s got that Louis Spence in the dressing room doin’ his f’#kin’ hair before he runs out ? Gary Reays’ head’s been turned now….he’s doing a f’#kin’ D.J. set on Saturday at f’#kin’ ‘Superstar Boudoir’. Mick Saunders is wearing leather f’#kin’ trousers and O’Hanlon turned up with a leather vest on the other day !
M.S.- Sounds like he’s out of control ?
BX.- Out of control ! Out of f’#kin’ control ! I should of done him in when he done you… Could never figure out why you wouldn’t let me ?
M.S.- I need that interview.
BX.- Get your interview before I get him ‘cos I’m Bouncin’!
Meanwhile I am released from hospital and invited to Paris by U.E.F.A. for The Ballon d’Or award . I take Binks as my guest and back-up in case Brunt kicks off. In recent weeks Brunt has attacked Oliver Holt and Harry Harris. He is still with his P.A. Louis Spence and is knocking round with Joey Essex . Rumours are circulating that he is about to appear in T.O.W.I.B. (The Only Way Is Brunty.) The season is over and the transfer request still stands. Brunt will not talk to Binks, instead, directing all dealings to his P.A. and now Agent, Louis Spence.
At Heathrow waiting for the flight to Paris.
M.S.- Here’s Louis coming over now.
BX- Looks like a right Mincer !
L.S- Hi Stevo ( in a camp voice ) Sorry about that er…..shall we say little misunderstanding…. Ian is so sorry, he doesn’t know what came over him (no pun intended) Whose your friend ?
M.S.- Thats o.k. Louis, it’s all forgotten about. This is Binksy…. Manager of Dock F.C.
L.S.- O.M.G…..So your Binksy.!!!…..Me and you just have to talk. This way girlfriend!
Louis prances off like Gary Reay through on goal….. beckoning Binksy to follow him.
BX- F’#kin’ girlfriend ! ….I’ll f’#kin’ kill him !
M.S.- Keep calm. Sort it with him ‘cos we need Brunty for next season and Louis holds the key. Give him anything he wants !
B.X.- Anything ?
M.S- Yes mate, anything !
Binksy disappears with Louis to the V.I.P.Lounge and I make my way over to a crowd of people gathering round someone holding court……..It’s Brunty….Pissed and mouthing off how he’s gonna get The Ballon d’Or and how he’s holding The Dock to ransom.
I.B- Yeah….I’ve got this Balloon thingy sewn up…..About time I got some recognition carrying this shower of Sh*t* ! He (Binks) wants to realise what I do for this club. I’ve got a ‘Fly on the Wall’ documentary coming soon. I can get him and his poxy team on the telly. Mind you…they won’t be able to fit Packmans arse on the screen…They had better up the ante next season or I’m off !
Brunty downs a Treble Whisky with a Snowball chaser in one and staggers off in the direction of the toilets. This is my chance…..should I do him in or hold off until I get the big one? In less than 24 hours Brunty is going to be crowned European Footballer of the Year and I could have the exclusive. I decide against doing him in ….there’s plenty of time for that….. and follow him into the bog’s.
Part 3 of The Brunty Interviews next month.
Carnage in the Bogs….. Binksy swings it with Louis and Brunty signs Mega deal.
THE “ASK AMMO?” COLUMN
ASK ‘AMMO?
Hi… I’m Lee Hammond and welcome to my new series of ASK ‘AMMO ? You can ask me anything you like about the game of football.
This week we kick off with a letter from Gary Reay. Reay Man asks……Hi Lee….you’re great at taking peno’s….can I ask you…what is the secret of taking a great peno like you?
Well…thanks for the letter Gaz. Being from Wallasey you should know what the secret is! All Wallasians have six fingers but it is a little known fact that certain Wallasians have six toes! I have six toes on my left peg and this gives me extra power and accuracy on my spot kicks. That extra digit gives me that little bit more in the dual between me and the keeper. By the way Gaz… if you think your getting the next peno…think again ‘cos I’m gonna win The Golden High Heel this year….. so do one Reay Man !
Dock 3-1 Heygarth (Houlihan’s BSFL Premier Division)
Goals:
Shaun Holmes
Paul Howell
Gary Reay
Report: To Follow by Mike Stephens
Photos: Chris Stading
Goals:
Paul Howell (2)
Lee Hammond (Pen)
Report: To Follow by Mike Stephens
Photos: Chris Stading
Brow 3-1 Dock (Cheshire Sunday Cup R2)
A disappointing exit from the Cheshire Cup at the hands of The Brow in a game where we seemed to have most of the play but ended up losing the tie because of not putting the ball away when the chances came begging. I’ll keep this short because I don’t want to write about a Cheshire Cup defeat and try and fathom any reasons as to why we got beat and I don’t think we can gain any laughs from reporting in the usual style.
That said, If anyone thinks that they had a decent game please make themselves known and if anyone wants to point the finger (management excluded) please point because you would get fingers pointed back at you.
As stated, we seemed on top for large periods but conceded goals at the wrong times. Off the top of my head I think they scored early ( first 10 mins ), then added another on the stroke of half-time and it’s looking like ‘ White Cliffs’ at the break. We’ve missed chances….Reay Man….Saunders….Reay Man again. They missed a peno and that seemed to gee us up a bit and Hammond nets one himself near the end and we’re in with half a chance. Lack of discipline crept in towards the end or should I say frustration crept in and we concede a late penalty to end our hopes for another year.
Report: Mike Stephens
Photos: Chris Stading
Africa Shirt Appeal
Dave Goodall and Village Road Runners have sent their sincere thanks to Dock AFC for the kit recently supplied for their Africa Football Shirt Appeal. Nice to know Children of Krystal Palace Academy orphanage in Ghana, Africa is now proudly playing football in Dock’s colours.
The Village Road Runners will be collecting again in a few months, so if any individuals have old Liverpool, Everton, Tranmere etc shirts / kits which you would like to donate to a good cause, please use the contact facility on this site to arrange collection. Also, if any teams have kits they no longer use then we would be more than pleased to take them off your hands.
Pictured left is Joe McArdle from The Village Roadrunners just finishing the recent Liverpool Marathon, well done Joe!!!
Argyll 0-2 Dock (Houlihan’s BSFL Premier Division)
Goals:
Paul Howell
Mike Saunders
Photos: Chris Stading
Dock 2-4 Shore Villa (Wirral Premier Cup)
In an all Houlihan’s Birkenhead Sunday League encounter in Round 2 of the Wirral Premier Cup, Shore Villa put in an excellent display to knock out Dock FC. Carl Clampitt broke the deadlock with a header in the 20th minute and two minutes into the 2nd half Tom Kellock doubled Villa’s advantage. It looked all over when Jon-Paul Wheadon struck from outside the box to make it three, but Dock hit back immediately through Shaun Turner; however their joy was short-lived when Adam Lea pounced on a goalkeeping error to score and despite Lee Hammond scoring a penalty with 18 minutes to go, Shore Villa held firm to claim a 4-2 victory and a place in the last 16.
Photos: Chris Stading
